'Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
And the dreams that you've only dreamed of
Once in a lullaby.
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly,
And the dreams that you've dared to dream
really do come true.'
-"Somewhere Over the Rainbow"
Vulnerability moment ahead.
I am going to be frank here. Well, not Frank as in a man named Frank but as in blatant. Each session is unique and special in it's own way. However, some sessions 'hit' me a little stronger. The Lewis family hired me a few years ago to photograph their 1st child's newborn photos. I was not as solid in newborn photography as I am now. What does that mean? Well, I was nervous. A bit insecure. ok....I was terrified. Terrified that I would not be able to produce beautiful, consistent photos of their angelic son. I knew how to safely handle a newborn but photographing a newborn, that's not easy. Well, what happened? He did not want to sleep. Hmmm, well, guess what? That's not so surprising. Babies can feel when people around them are 'uneasy'.
After HOURS of trying to get him to sleep, I decided to change plans. I decided we would go to a comfortable place and he could cuddle with momma. He was not feeling secure and he needed his momma. Best decision. I stopped trying to create art and instead we let life/art happen. Ann and her new son seemed to become lost in each other. Ann definitely was lost in her son. It was beautiful...dare I say, perfection. Were the images technically perfect? No. Nope. Not at all. But the love, beauty and the moments captured were perfect (in my eyes). It was a defining moment for me. Capturing the raw, real moments of life is my style and my passion. Yes, I do love creating portraits and I will continue to grow, learn, work hard to produce those lovely, classic portraits that we want/need. However, capturing the emotion.....yes, that's my drive, my love. It is what gets my booty moving and on fire.
Yes, that session helped me define my photography style but when Ann hired me to document the next stage of her growing family....well, I am not gonna hide it, I was ecstatic!! See I knew what I wanted to photograph and I loved the images of those real moments between her and her son...but did she? Were they good? Good enough? And I thought to myself, "I don't want to be JUST good enough. I want to capture what I am feeling. What they are feeling. What IS". I had always wondered if Ann and Aaron were happy with those images. Because, remember, they were not technically correct. Aaron and Ann choosing me again told me that they did like their images. I don't think they realize how much them trusting me with this time of their lives means to me. How much hiring me again has helped me grow in my craft but also in confidence in trusting myself, my own voice which I believe to be the voice of my creator.
I have said it so many times and I really mean it, I LOVE seeing my past clients kiddos grow. Lil' N is so gentle and calm. I adore these images of the Lewis family, some are posed and others are 'real moments'. A mix of the best of life.
Thank you Lewis family for trusting me. Thank you to ALL of my clients for believing in me. As sometimes it is hard to believe in your own self and we need someone else to believe in us to keep us going.
If you read all of this, thank you. And go forth and keep on rockin'! Oh...and Miss N, she is the perfect addition to this gentle,sweet family. Oh, and not so shocking....she slept wonderfully for her session. ;-)